Won’t You Be My Number Neighbor?
The internet is full of really dumb trends and stories.
Let’s storm Area 51.
Is Fidel Castro really Justin Trudeau’s father? (This is worth googling)
Did Carol Baskins murder her husband?
How about planking? Laying like a plank on random things. That was a thing.
Remember the hottest trend in food, Tide Pods, a tasty single serving of detergent. I still don’t understand why people want to eat detergent when there is popcorn in the ceiling.
My favorite recent internet trend is “number neighbor”.
A “number neighbor” is the person who has the phone number one digit away from you in either direction — up or down. All you have to do to find yours is either add or subtract one from the last digit in your phone number. If your number were 555-555-5555, for example — then your number neighbors would be 555-555-5554 and 555-555-5556.
At my last job, I would get bombarded daily with calls from strangers looking for the Jamba Juice in Penn Station.
I was beguiled at first. Why are people calling me asking for Jamba Juice? Then I took the logical step and looked up the phone number for Jamba Juice.
It turned out that Jamba Juice was my number neighbor.
This may aggravate a lesser man, but I took it in stride. Readily answering any Jamba related questions to the best of my ability.
Want to know the calorie count in a medium mango-a-go-go. You got it!
Is it true that due to a produce delivery issue, your craving for a razzmatazz would go unfulfilled today? Who could say? Actually I could. Just not factually.
Sadly, the Penn Station Jamba Juice closed this month.
To honor its memory and all the other fallen Jambas. If you find yourself taking mass transit. Please pour out an ounce of orange dream machine on the floor at any of America’s terrible transit hubs.